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Yes, I like Firefly and Serenity.

New level of dorkdom, folks.

Your results:
You are Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command)
Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command)
Malcolm Reynolds (Captain)
Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic)
River (Stowaway)
Wash (Ship Pilot)
Derrial Book (Shepherd)
Inara Serra (Companion)
Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)
A Reaver (Cannibal)
Jayne Cobb (Mercenary)
Dependable and trustworthy.
You love your significant other and
you are a tough cookie when in a conflict.

Click here to take the "Which Serenity character am I?" quiz...

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The letter that Jeri found "insulting."

Friday, June 15, 2007
San Francisco, CA 94131

DeWolf Realty Company, Inc.
4330 California Street
San Francisco, CA 94118

To Whom It May Concern:

This morning at about 6:45AM, Kathy was in the shower when the metal plate that surrounds the ceiling light/fan in the bathroom fell to the floor. Afterwards, several pieces of metal from inside the fan also fell out. Luckily, no one was standing underneath the light when this occurred, or else there certainly would have been an injury.

We find it deplorable that our apartment is in such a dilapidated state. The fan was “fixed” a few months ago, but only by a loose translation of the word “fixed.” We informed Jeri that our bathroom fan had been removed sometime in early 2006 when it began to make a terrible noise. Jeri promptly put in a work order and the ceiling fan was replaced, but it still makes a terrible screeching noise when turned on.

Other bathrooms in the building have similarly dysfunctional fans; we hear our next-door neighbor’s screeching fan every day. However, there are bathrooms in the building that have fully functional, normal-sounding fans as well, so we know it is possible for it to be fixed correctly.

When the fan and light were put back together a few months ago, the person who repaired it obviously used cheap glue and a tiny, rusty screw to hold everything in place on the ceiling. Of course, condensation in the bathroom eventually caused this glue to de-stick, and the screw to become rusty, causing everything to come crashing down.

Last week, someone repaired our leaking shower faucet. The showerhead no longer leaks, but shortly after the repair was completed we noticed that the faucet knobs (and their metal plate backing) are literally coming out of the wall. The caulk holding the faucet knobs to the wall has been falling apart ever since Jeremy’s poorly executed shower installation in late 2005. Now the situation is much worse. We are concerned that serious water problems may occur, causing all sorts of issues in our bathroom as well as throughout the building if not properly dealt with.

We are still awaiting a time frame for the replacement of our patio door. We have been informed that DeWolf and Jeri are waiting for “quotes” for its replacement. In the meantime, our door continually breaks, and we oftentimes cannot open it at all. This is both an annoyance and most likely a serious fire hazard.

Our rent was increased last year to $1622.12 a month. Considering the amount of money we pay each month to live in our apartment, we don’t think it is unreasonable to demand action regarding worn out, broken and hazardous items in our living space.

Please advise when we can expect the following items to be fixed:

1. Bathroom ceiling fan – both replacing the screeching motor and permanently affixing to the ceiling to ensure it does not fall down again
2. Shower faucet knobs – re-caulking/replacing
3. Patio door replacement

We have submitted work order sheets for each of the above items. Thank you for your prompt attention to these matters.


Kathleen W. & Katherine D.

cc: Jeri Raimondi

So.... Jeri's voicemail was pretty much implying that we should have *known* the metal plate thingy was going to fall down in the bathroom. We should have *known* that the faucet knobs were going to start coming out of the shower wall after the repair guy fixed the leak.

"How the HECK can I fix anything if you don't tell me about it?" Uhm... Jeri... we *are* telling you. In this letter. With the attached work orders. What part of that is so confusing, exactly?

I really love how she claims we are the "only people" in the building who have ever complained about anything. She says, "every week it's something new with you people!" Uh, what? This is the first letter we have ever written to DeWolf about anything. We have, however, submitted work orders for things that have broken in our apartment. Is submitting a work order a form of complaining? I'm sorry - I didn't know we weren't allowed to "complain" when things fall from the ceiling threatening a concussion, our patio door won't open, the shower leaks constantly and the hot & cold knobs are uncaulked and falling out of the wall. My bad.

The best part, for sure, is the end of the message wherein she says "don't you EVER write a letter like this again!" If that's not a threat, I don't know what is.

Of course, I'm not going to lie and say this hasn't shaken me up a little. Katie is scared that Jeri might do something crazy to us in our sleep (I wouldn't put it past her, either). I know she's just trying to bully us into shutting up or leaving, but I refuse to let that happen. They would love for us to leave, because that would mean a few extra hundred a month for that apartment from the next renters, probably $1800+.

The person who owns the building has owned it for 30+ years. The windows have never been replaced, nor have the patio doors. The hallway carpeting has been there for at least 20 years, I would guess. You *know* that mortgage is paid off... so the rent $$ from 36 units is *pure profit.* Even if the mortgage wasn't paid off - 36 units, 1-4 bedrooms each, maybe an average of $1700 per unit - that's $61,200 the owner rakes in PER MONTH for that building. You have to be kidding me if they can't afford to install new windows and doors, new carpeting, etc. in the building.

This is the second bad landlord experience we're had in San Francisco... the first being, of course, the moldy one bedroom from hell on Golden Gate Ave. It's really disheartening that this is the kind of treatment renters receive in this city - and landlords can get away with it because people want so badly to live here.

So, I guess we're going to fight the urge to move until we *really* move - out of the city for good. Who knows when that will be.
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    exhausted exhausted
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Voice Post: From JERI, our lovable landlady.

716K 3:38
“Transcription later, maybe?”

Transcribed by: librarianlust

All we did was write a letter to our management company, cc-ing Jeri, regarding some fuckups in the apartment (most notably, the steel plate surrounding our bathroom fan randomly fell to the ground last week, apparently because it had been glued to the ceiling with not much else holding it up).

We didn't even say anything negative about Jeri; in fact, we mentioned that she "promptly" had someone repair the ceiling fan the first time. None of this has anything to do with her, really, and yet she takes it all so personally.

Doesn't a letter with some work orders constitute "letting them know" about things that are broken?

I'll post the letter later. I love that she said all of this on Katie's voicemail. At what point is this considered harrassment?
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    annoyed annoyed
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Weird fucking crazy ass dream

Okay, so Katie and I are living outdoors in the woods (but with our bed) and my cousin Carol is hanging out with us. She ends up spending the night with us and suddenly we have 10+ Elliotts living with us. They're all really tame, though, and absolutely identical to each other. Katie and I discuss what to name the other Elliotts (Wilbur, Henry are possibilities) and then I look up at the sky and there's this big scary looking ship thing up there, with a majorly phallic front side poking outward. It's all white and swimming around in the sky as if the sky was the ocean. I'm like "what the fuck is going on?" thinking that we're being invaded or some shit, so I naturally open my laptop and on the Google homepage is a picture of the ship-thing, which is apparently named "Thurston Tunnel." Someone from the sky is shouting about how he is offering a "spiritual experience."

Then I woke up all sweaty and discombobulated.

And I thought, what the fuck is the Thurston Tunnel? I've never heard of a Thurston anything, so how did my brain come up with that?

Thurston Lava Tube

That's the first web site that comes up when Googling "Thurston Tunnel." A "lava tube" called "Thurston Lava Tube" otherwise known as "Thurston Tunnel." WHAT THE CRAP?

"It is a small hike up and then down, down from the road to whet your appetite for this type of revelation, but when you get there you will finally see the type of passages that lava loves so well to travel along there in the bowels away from the prying eyes of man."

"revelation"? "spiritual experience"? WHAT DOES IT MEEEAAAN? Am I supposed to go to Hawaii and visit this lava tunnel thingy?

Katie thinks I'm nuts.
  • Current Music
    new Tori!
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Time Wasting

Did you guys know you can play old school Apple games online?

Check it:

Virtual Apple dot org dot web site


I recall hours and hours of "computer" classes in 4th, 5th, 6th grades involving Oregon Trail. Why the hell did I always kill off everyone in my crew before we reached the end? Forever Doomed To Fail at Oregon Trail, starring the Awkwardly Tall and Skinny Tomboy With Fluffy Hair.

Is it just me, or is this game just freakin' ridiculous? And only now do I see how dark and scary this shit probably was for me as a kid...

You know kids always name their characters after people they know. What the hell do you think it was like for an eight-year-old to see MOMMY HAS DIED suddenly appear on the screen while sitting there in computer class?

Ugh. I give up on Oregon F-in Trail.

  • Current Music
    Goldfrapp in my head.
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Having a Mullet Fetish is SO Five Years Ago...

But I can't help but gaze with admiration at the really glorious ones I come across.

I kept telling myself on the way to work today, "you MUST document this mullet sighting!" and then I promptly forgot when I arrived at my office and my boss threw ten million papers at me while asking me to call/email/fax someone something, etc. simultaneously.

THANKFULLY, I remembered 8 hours later.

SO, the mullet. Oh my god. Business Man Mullet. Imagine this but with much more coif, higher on top (I'd say 4 inches above his head), very SOFT looking (I wanted to TOUCH it, it was very Pert Plus ) and the guy totally fit the Business Man Mullet description from

4. businessmullet a.k.a. safety cut: These mullets want it all: business in the front, party in the back.

When at work, their mulletude offends and annoys their co-workers, but luckily (and not coincidentally), these mullets are rarely in any position of real power (though they tend to think they are).

Interesting creatures, their hair is short enough not to offend the boss, but long enough to keep their rebellious comrades from becoming suspicious.

Mulletude: 5

Aggressiveness: 3

Hobbies: sexual harassment, taking advantage of intoxicated employees at company gatherings, browsing thru kiddie porn on company time (with stiffy).

Sightings: financial districts, strip clubs.

Favorite Band: Joe Cocker

I think perhaps this sighting was so miraculous because I haven't seen many mullets since moving to San Francisco. I think they outlawed the mullet here back in '89. Too bad.
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    jubilant jubilant
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Three things:

a) I am SO HAPPY that my bus was late today. About 15 of us were standing around, checking our watches, wandering out into the street in desperation, when a little Chihuahua came running up the street. He was wearing a little denim jacket, and his little mouth was wide open, panting with excitement. At first, I freaked out, because he was apparently alone and about to dilly dally into the street. But then he lifted his leg, peed on a lamp post, and waited for his owner to catch up (he was running up the street as the little guy was peeing). Then I realized there were three chihuahuas, and their escorts were two big burly men. One of the men was clearly embarrassed to all hell that he was walking these three dogs (all of whom were sporting fancy looking jackets), and he kept sort of darting his eyes around in fear and spitting on the sidewalk as if to say, "I may be walking some 3 pound dogs, but that doesn't mean I can't kick your ass."

b) Is it some kind of law that at least one disgustingly stinky person must be on the bus at all times? And is it equally important that this person always sits next to or near me?

c) Elliott's coming home. We can't wait to meet you, Elliott!!! Friday is the Big Day. *squeal*
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    ecstatic ecstatic